I think most of us know that one of the ONLY things guaranteed in life is change.
Sometimes it’s a pleasant shift in direction, other times it feels like a curse.
We humans easily become creatures of habit. There are feelings of safety and security that go with routine and predictability. And if there’s a situation in our lives that changes abruptly, such as a loss of a job, relationship or anything else we weren’t prepared to give up, it can certainly make us feel deep sadness, fear, and defeat.
So how do you deal with change in a healthy and empowering way, even if the change isn’t what you wanted?
I have some tips.
The following are 3 ways to deal with change that will leave you feeling hopeful, inspired and quite possibly, excited.
3 Ways to Deal with Change
1 – Accept it.
This may (almost) sound condescending, and it’s easier said than done – but the truth is, peace comes from acceptance. That doesn’t mean to take on a victim-like mentality, but it DOES mean that to come up with an intelligent plan of action, it helps to clearly see exactly where you are in the grand scheme of things.
Many years ago, my family moved to another country. My “home base” and the people I loved (and needed) the most were gone from my day to day life. I felt depressed, alone and scared. I knew I couldn’t change the situation, so I had to accept it for what it was and get busy working on myself.
While I initially went through a very tough time and I missed them terribly, it forced me to grow up in ways that likely wouldn’t have transpired if my comfort and safety zones hadn’t been disrupted by their leaving.
The good news is they eventually moved back, but by then, I was able to be a better daughter, friend and overall asset to their lives because I used their absence to elevate myself.
They moved away from an irresponsible young adult who still acted like a child. They came back to a real adult who was capable of giving – and BEING a light in their lives. Sad as it was to lose them for a while, it was exactly what I needed to get my act together and I’m a better person in every way because of it.
2 – Stay open to new possibilities
When an unexpected change comes your way, it helps to keep an open mind and be curious about what’s possible.
For example, if you lost your job, this would be a good time to ask yourself some meaningful questions, such as:
- Was I happy?
- Is this what I truly want to do with my life?
- Am I capable of more?
- Is it possible there is something better out there I wouldn’t have seen if I stayed where I’ve been all this time?
If your relationship ended, this is the time to discover if you were truly happy or if there were things that weren’t in your best interests for the long haul. Maybe YOU needed to change and your relationship ending was the catalyst to encourage you to grow up and become a better partner.
And, sometimes, people just change in general, causing them to grow apart. Perhaps this person was perfect for you for a season, but with regard to a lifetime, you might be missing out on other relationships and experiences that would make you happier and more fulfilled in ways you wouldn’t have entertained had things stayed the same.
Peace comes from allowing life to move. With this movement, there is growth, expansion, and opportunity. #selfawareness #growth #wisdomClick To TweetIt’s fine and healthy to grieve, but while you’re doing that, keep an open mind and explore how this may benefit you in the long run. I’ve seen it work this way for others as well as myself. It’s the act of having faith that things have a way of working themselves out – even when there’s no physical evidence to support it.
3 – Seek wisdom, emotional intelligence, and spiritual maturity
There are books, blogs, videos, movies and all sorts of other means available to see how people have overcome adversity and unwanted change in their lives.
Many will tell you they found their soul mate after thinking they’d never get over their lost love. Others will relay the stories of how they became a successful entrepreneur sometime after losing their job, even though at first they freaked out and thought their lives were over.
Emotional intelligence is the act of using your emotions as an internal guidance system. You listen to them, but you don’t react FROM them.
Spiritual maturity is about asking life and yourself questions to help you expand your perspective and allow the higher self – the observer – to see your life and its possibilities from the mountain top instead of relying on your limited physical mind to guide you – which only sees things from the ground.
Deal with Change Intelligently
Try these techniques out the next time life throws a curveball your way.
Change is inevitable, but with wisdom, such changes can elevate and improve your life instead of leaving you feeling defeated, victimized and dejected.
Years ago, I read the book “Who Moved My Cheese?” It’s a book about how change is inevitable and why it’s actually a positive thing.
We’ll never stop life from moving – and to be honest, for the most part, we don’t want to.
For me, it’s a matter of allowing myself to evolve. Life has to change for that to happen, otherwise, I’d never learn, develop strength and grow.
I hope you got something out of this post. If you’ve had issues dealing with change – or if change has been a blessing in your life, I’d love to hear about it below.
Thanks for stopping by and until next time, take care.
Amar Kumar says
Hey Dana,
In my opinion – Change can sometimes be fun, exciting and refreshing.
We really need to develop awareness of the changes that occur around us.
Sometimes, no matter how interesting the things we are up to in life are, we can tend to feel a sense of stagnation if we find that we keep doing the same things over and over again.
I want to reach out and seek new possibilities when they present themselves.
Itβs a matter of staying open to them. Staying open has resulted in new work, new relationships and new growth.
The journey to be open to possibilities in your life and within yourself is layered with re-framing thoughts.
It asks us to consider the mindset that we bring to the moment.
It is call to experience life with less judgment and more willingness to see beyond our perceptions and expectations.
Eventually, thanks for exploring your innovative thoughts with us.
With best wishes,
Amar Kumar
Dana says
Hey Amar,
So true. It does require reframing (and often questioning) thoughts. Change can be wonderful, even if sometimes they come from pain, at first. But eventually, these things can lead to transformation beyond what our physical minds could have ever conceived.
Yep, doing the same things over and over again certainly can lead to stagnation. Even if we do the same activities, WE can always evolve as human beings and alter what we’re doing insofar as learning new techniques, implementing new ideas and meeting new people.
I loved your comment! Awesome & thought-provoking feedback.
Thanks so much for your visit π
Aadarsh Roy says
Hey DANA ,
Excellent post with great ways to deal with the changes. I trully like your post and especially the ways that you have suggested.
Accepting the change is really a good way. Stay open to new possibilities and any unexpected change is also a great way and will also increase the curiosity. As these tips will helps us to stay positive and calm in life.
Truly inspirational post and thanks for sharing.
Dana says
Hey there Aadarsh,
Glad you liked this. I had fun putting it together.
Change can be tough even under positive circumstances. I’m glad these ideas resonated with you π
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and enjoy your weekend!
Billy James says
Thanks for your suggestion, it’s very important to stay positive in rush full city life.
Dana says
Hi Billy,
Glad you enjoyed this. Is the city life a change for you? Regardless, yes, it does help to stay positive & enjoy quiet time whenever you get a chance.
Billy James says
Very much agree with your thoughts, Life is a great teacher! Keep positive people nearby you and kick negative people out from you. Create your own world. I think it’s a great way to stay positive in life.
Dana says
Yep. Everyone has the right to decide who they want in their life. I say, be choosy and choose wisely. π
Billy James says
Yeah!! you are right, Don’t force yourself to love someone. Takes time to know them and Soon your heart will let you know is the person is right for you or not π Try Osho π